Off to the Motor City Again
dd February 7th, 2007
I don’t think I can count the number of times I’ve answered the phone in the last 15 years to hear one of these:
Dad is in the hospital again
Dad is in the convalescent facility
Mom is in the hospital
Mom is in the convalescent facility
My father suffered a major stroke about 13 years ago and fought valiantly in a downhill struggle, and managed to hang on for 10 years before dying at age 91. But, he was constantly going back to the hospital and/or the nursing home after subsequent episodes and other problems. My Mom was the main care-giver and during the time she cared for my dad (I’m convinced because of the stress) fell at least 3 times breaking both hips. She has been on a walker since the 2nd break, several years ago. I think she has actually fared better health wise after my dad passed away which I attribute to the removal of the daily pounding of caregiving . But, the other day, that dreaded phone call came again from my brother, who coincidentally happened to be in Detoit to visit his daughter and my Mom.
Mom complained of swelling of her ankles and pain. He took her to an orthopedic doc who (good man) said “This is not an orthopedic problem. I think there’s fluid build-up from a weak heart.” So, off to the hospital again - diagnosis: Congestive heart failure. I guess this is not so uncommon for a 92 year old. New meds seem to have stabilized things and she has today been transferred to a convalescent center - the one she likes because the food is better.
I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining, but I’m also the kind of person who hates unplanned trips when I’m working on so many other things. And, I just was in Detroit in December and in Chicago in January visiting my 98 year old Aunt in a convalescent situation. And,who likes to fly these days, especially in the middle of winter to the Midwest?
But, I’m always so glad I’ve gone in the past. While my dad was alive, they both appreciated my visits so much. And, now, of course my Mom does too. I know I’ll be a big comfort to her. It’s no fun being in any institution so I’ll do what I can to brighten her days. It makes my annoyances seems so trivial and ridiculously selfish.
So, I’m off to the Motor City once more. Hope I don’t freeze my tush off.
Safe trip. Kindness is what makes the world a happier place.
HAH!There is a lot of resonance here my friend… last night I started a series of posts that I think, I hope I finally have the words for…we must be drinking from the same cup.
i remember scuffling with a buddy in Detroit on the way home from School in some lady’s front yard… she came to her door and told us to “Take that behavior down to the corner of Conner and Gratiot”…
Last night, I went to the theater with my Mom. It was okay, the best of this season anyway. In light of your post, I’m thinking maybe I didn’t appreciate it enough. Travel safely.
I regret not going more often when my parents were sick. You’re definitely doing the right thing, although I’ll miss you.
Pauline — thanks!
Steve — Conner and Gratiot. Wow! I think a different side of town from where I grew up. Look forward to your new posts.
Quentin - Enjoy the time with your mom. You’re lucky she’s in the same town. BTW, there’s a great new song I discovered the other day - “My Life”, by Grace Griffith. Great song written by Iris Diment. One line of the chorus: “But I gave joy to my mother”
L2L — I’ll miss you too. Catch you on your blog
Dave - it was a different part of town from me as well- i was in Grosse pointe Park, believe it or not… Conner and Gratiot was famous, no, notorious was it not? Even us kids knew what that old lady meant… pretty rough down there…
RE; my posts about my Dad are flying right out of me…everybody seems to see them as sad, and I am trying to take the steam out of them and still tell the tale. I don’t much believe in this sort of thing, but it seems like everything was rather well planned out back then.
Cheers!
[…] Here’s a short update from the Motor City on my Mom. She’s been at the W. Bloomfield Nursing/Convalescent Home since Wednesday. She is definitely improving - fluids just about all gone from her ankles and lung. Strength is returning slowly but steadily and her spirits seem better too. […]
2rjjka3px4te11px